Erika Allison's Artastic Blog

“Candle in the Wind”

I feel like I’m winding down from 2009 and revving up for 2010 all at the same time. To me, it’s a continuation. There really is no “end” or “beginning”. I guess our thinking about it in those terms allows us to “end” whatever went wrong/didn’t work out and “begin” anew. I guess I can buy that. But, I never make new year’s resolutions. It’s too depressing to find that I can’t keep promises I made to myself. It’s putting additional pressure on. I think I have some built-in resolutions: keep learning, keep experimenting, keep creating. That’s what it’s all about for me.

I can’t say I wouldn’t like some improvements in the new year. I’ve always thought of myself as prolific. Yet, I haven’t produced much in 2009. I’ve let things get in the way. Have to change that! And, I’d like to keep learning more about using my computer. I need to know!

I remember to pat myself on the back for some accomplishments in 2009 as well. I’m liking where I am in my work right now. I’ve shown my work a couple of times. I HAVE learned some high-tech stuff (although I have a lot more to learn). So, I have high expectations for 2010. And, I intend to do my part in realizing some good things.

I think I’ll have a glass of wine and watch some New Year’s fireworks from my yard (I should be able to see the fireworks on the Las Vegas Strip) to bring in the new year. And, tomorrow, I’ll start a new painting.

Sometimes it seems like life gets in the way and interferes with my ability to make art… when I want to.

It’s hard when I’m  “inspired” to paint and all kinds of things interfere with my plans. It tends to make me angry and/or frustrated. I have ideas. I want to paint. I NEED to paint. But, I have to do this and I have to do that. And, the car needs to go in for some repair …and ends up taking all day …and into another day.

Why me? Aaaaaagh! I try to remain calm and just go about doing what I have to do. I know that getting angry and grumpy isn’t going to help. As a matter-of-fact, that usually makes everything worse. That makes the people around you angry and grumpy. It’s not their fault that everything isn’t going smoothly.

So – the Big Irritator this week is the car. It needs to go in to see what’s wrong – and get repaired.

I went “prepared” for a long wait. I took my crossword puzzle book and two pencils. I never work crosswords in ink. It’s guaranteed I’ll be doing some erasing. I forgot to mention that I like crossword puzzles that are HARD – ones I’ll most likely not be able to finish completely. I took along my Washington Post crossword puzzle book. I used to have the New York Times crossword puzzle book that I loved.

I also took along my copy of Julia Cameron‘s Walking In This World. I have read it through several times. I can’t remember how many times. But, I get something from it every time. When I finish it, I will either go back to The Artist’s Way and read that again, or I will re-read Walking in This World again. The books are full of reminders about what it is to be an artist, what one should be doing, the pitfalls to watch out for, and all those wonderful quotes.

So, while car problems got in the way of my plans to attend a holiday coffee and to spend a day painting, maybe it was meant to be. It provided some probably much-needed time to slow down, think, and think some more.

I could read a lot more than I do. I used to read a lot. But, it takes away from my painting time. I tend to think in terms of creating time and other things that interfere with creating time. Perhaps I need to expand my horizons and remember that all those other things fill the well. Where does one get the experiences to paint about if one isn’t “experiencing”?

So, maybe life doesn’t get in the way after all. Life is what it’s all about!

Hmmm…wasting time…

Is there really such a thing for an artist?

I often feel guilty about “wasting time”.   I could/should be doing something worthwhile. I should be painting, cleaning the studio, building painting panels, learning how to use the computer better, learning how to use my camera, and on and on and on…
There’s ALWAYS something that could be done.

But, is doing “nothing” really a waste of time? Maybe I’m filling the well.

Actually, I’m not really doing NOTHING. I’m just not doing the things I listed. And, when I think about it, I’m really doing more than one thing. I’m MULTI-TASKING!
Hey, I like that! It’s true…I AM multi-tasking.

While I think I’m wasting time cruising around on the computer, I’m actually researching and fueling my creative thoughts. I might check out facebook, which is heavy on art friends. So, their links are often art related. I follow several favorite artists’ blogs. Those are full of thoughts, inspiration and information. I check out current events. That alone is fuel for my art. I say my art is about the obvious and absurd in life. The news is my best resource!

And, if I haven’t rationalized my way to it’s okay to “waste” time now and then, we truly do need some down time to re-fuel.

The learning curve…yes, it seems that my learning curve is HUGE. I’m referring to anything having to do with the computer and how to use it well. I love e-mail, facebook, websites. I enjoy surfing and finding new artists and keeping up with ones I’ve already found and/or followed. But, when it comes to actually DOING anything, MAKING anything (such as a website) I have no clue…I’m TRYING to learn. I WANT to learn. I’m not sure there’s enough time for me to learn it all – or at least not FAST enough. I want to know NOW. Fortunately, I found a great webmaster who has created a website for me, among other things. And, she’s teaching me how to do some things myself. An artist really should know how to do all this. Maybe if you grew up with computers it wouldn’t all seem so foreign. As an artist, I create all kinds of things. I make my painting surfaces. I can use tools and power tools. I am comfortable with these things. I’m hoping to get comfortable using the tools the computer offers as well.

I have a show opening this evening. I decided it would be a good idea to create a sign with my name in the style of my artwork. So far, so good… Then, I decided I should take a picture of that and have it to post on my blog and my facebook, etc. Oooooh…now that learning curve comes into play. I managed to download the camera. Most of you wouldn’t find this a big deal, I’m sure. Now, I need to re-size the image so I can post it on here and on facebook and e-mail it to a few friends. I spent the whole morning trying to figure it all out. I had folders inside of folders where they didn’t belong. And, I’m being asked for what I consider technical info that I have no clue about. I stumbled through the process several times. I THINK I have something to post.

I know a lot of you would say I should take a course or two. And, I could take a photography course. Then, I could always consider a woodworking course so I could improve on those skills. I really want to be an artist and apply those skills that I’ve spent a lifetime honing. I think my time is better spent creating. I will continue to learn more about using my computer. I hate having to admit I’m a dinosaur!

Now, to see if my morning’s efforts paid off…

I don’t walk into the studio to find inspiration. It’s not that it can’t be found there. It can be found anywhere and everywhere. Inspiration comes from living life. Any little thing can trigger a thought, an emotion, a visual that makes me want to create. I’m especially vulnerable to textures. And, they’re everywhere! Shiny, smooth, rough, cracked, polished, jagged, crumbly…the list goes on. I can see patterns in the textures. Sometimes a certain texture will evoke a memory, a fleeting thought, an idea…inspiration to start creating. It can be frustrating when all these ideas start cascading in my head and I’m NOT in the studio and probably won’t be there for some time. I guess the ideas go into a storage module somewhere in the brain. Hopefully, they will come out again when called upon. That’s what I mean when I say inspiration comes from living life. These experiences are constant and unending. They get stored somewhere…in the experience bank?

When I go into the studio I often DON’T have an idea of what I’m going to do. I go in because I LIKE it in there. It’s my favorite place. It’s where I do what I love most to do: paint and create. So, now, I NEED an idea. I NEED inspiration. Where is it? Stored somewhere in the brain. And, how do I get it out here where I can use it? Turn on the music, start putting paints out, look around the studio…Anything can trigger a thought, a memory, a visual. Oh, yeah, remember that beautiful rusty stain? The patina on the copper gutter? The crackled ice on the puddle in the street? The rough bark on the tree? The colors in the sunset last night? The change of color from the sunny spot to the shady spot? The dancing light on the lake?

Then, of course, I have to decide what I’m going to DO with that inspiration. The fun begins…